I Am Not Fearless (What’s Beautiful)

It’s been a few weeks since I wrote an update on my Under Armour What’s Beautiful goals. (I am working with Under Armour and Fitfluential to promote the Under Armour What’s Beautiful campaign to redefine the female athlete by setting epic goals and pushing past where we’ve ever been and where we thought we could go. If you haven’t visited the Under Armour What’s Beautiful site, you are missing out on some awesome inspiration and serious motivation!)

While my main goal is to
Run faster, get stronger, and remember to breathe.

Run Weights Yoga Collage

a secondary goal has emerged: learning to use clip-in shoes on my bike.

Clip-In Bike Shoes

The first day I tried clip-in shoes, I scraped up my knee.

Clip In Fail

The second try–my first ride on the bike path–went much better.

Bluemont Bike Ride

20 miles! No blood!

But, the third time was not the charm.

Clip-In Shoe Fail

I had a pretty major wreck that left its mark on my knee.
It was still looking pretty ugly a week later,
when I ran the Lawyers Have Heart 10K.

Bruised Knee LHH Race Day

Luckily it didn’t hurt when I ran.
The next weekend, as we were getting ready to head to the bike path again,
I had a knot in my stomach.

Clip In Shoes

I wanted to tag a picture of me on my bike with #fearless,
but I knew that wasn’t true.
I was scared.

I pushed through those fears for 23 miles with only one minor fall,
but that added a new bruise to the same knee and a big bruise to my other thigh
(from my brakes? my pedal?).

Injuries From Clip-In Shoes

This weekend, I was looking for an excuse not to ride.
Would it rain?
Should I risk another bruise when my old bruises haven’t quite healed yet?
What if I really hurt myself this time?
But I knew I had to get back on my bike,
before my fear took root,
before I decided that I am just too uncoordinated,
before I give up.

I remembered my favorite Under Amour What’s Beautiful poster

Getting Out Of Your Own Way

and decided to get out of my own way.

 Facing Down Fears

I am happy to report that my 9 mile ride was uneventful. I rode cautiously, and unclipped at the first sign of danger ahead–a boy on his tricycle on the wrong side of the path, a man walking four dogs, busy intersections.

I’m still not confident of my ability to clip-out on short notice, but I know I need to keep riding–and practicing–to develop that skill. Yet, I find myself wondering if I am being badass or dumbass when I climb on my bike and hear that “click” as my shoes lock into place.

Have you ever given up on a goal?

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18 Responses to I Am Not Fearless (What’s Beautiful)

  1. Miz says:

    I have given up on SO MANY GOALS—but only when I knew deep inside it was time to re-evaluate and that it wasnt born from fear.


  2. @fitmomtraining says:

    Sometimes fear can be a good thing. It forces us to slow down, evaluate and think about why it is we want to do what we're doing. In that, we can either decide that our fear is unreasonable an work to overcome it, or realize that our fear is well placed and look at alternative means of achieving our desired outcome.

  3. Cristina says:

    Clipping in and out confidently only comes with practice, patience and time. Do you have a trainer? Somewhere you can stand your bike and practice click/unclick thousands of time? Go cautiously but know that the more anxious you are the greater the chance of falling. Imagine yourself a total badass with that click sound and go for it. Soon enough you will be able to balance without unclipping and then show the world your cycling prowress. Good luck!

  4. Jill Conyers says:

    I have revised my goals but I don't think that's giving up on them. Remember the name of your blog 🙂 It's your perseverance that will get you through this and I have no doubt you will overcome your fears.

  5. I've changed my goals several times.
    You are going to master the bike shoes and clips – I know it!!!

  6. christineyu69776410 says:

    I completely agree with Jill!! I do think that fear is a good thing and I've learned to embrace it over the past year or so. Not to say that you should go out and be a dumbass or anything but it helps us know and understand out limits and what it takes to move past it and what we can learn from it too. I haven't given up entirely on my goals but I have revised. OK, I have given up on goals that weren't serving me or where I was just trying to prove a point.

  7. You are so tough! I have not ventured to bike clipped in yet… it’s definitely one of my fears. But I’m feeling inspired by you!

  8. Carrie says:

    I love the question of being a badass or a dumbass. So hard to tell the difference sometimes.

    LOVE the quote on the last picture. That's much more reasonable. So glad you got back out there!

  9. I tried to clipin with my bike once and hated it. I crashed so many times and watched to many people crash I couldn't understand why anyone would use them. lol I have the little "toe cages" as I call them. For me they're great because I can ride with any shoes I own and it's actually easier for me during a tri since I don't go as far and wouldn't wanna change shoes anyway. I'm glad you're sticking with your goals though, it is good to face fears and make sure you've really tried all things before moving on

  10. Ahh the good old clips. I actually got much better by practicing with my bike on the trainer indoors. I think that some goals we have to readjust as life happens, others we just need to be willing for them to take time!

  11. Rachael C says:

    I am impressed with the fact that you are pushing yourself to keep going, despite the struggle. To me, it seems like being fearless is less impressive than being fearful and still pushing yourself to achieve your goals.

  12. I love that Under Armor poster! Falling is such a humbling experience–I feel your pain (no pun intended)!
    Alyson @ Disney Runs In The Family recently posted…Why Getting Back is Harder than Getting ThereMy Profile

  13. Yikes! Sorry about your leg. Keep on keeping on though!
    Meranda@fairytalesandfitness recently posted…Building up confidence AFTER signing up for a race challange: AKA Goofy ChallengeMy Profile

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