Summer vacation was a bit too long for my son. He broke some rules and had to spend his last days of freedom grounded. I give him credit for accepting his punishment as the fair consequence that it was. He didn’t fight us with attitude or try to talk himself out of it.
Honestly, it’s been nice having this time to spend together before he starts his senior year of college. (Pass the Kleenex® facial tissues, my baby will be graduating in 9 months!)
But, I am feeling “grounded” too. Since he is home for dinner every night, I feel obligated to be home on time (no goofing off at work and making it up by staying late) and fixing a decent meal (grilled cheese and soup just doesn’t cut it). 
While I don’t feel bad about seeing my friends on weekend days, it somehow seems worse to leave him alone at night. So, we’ve been staying home too–although hurricane Irene pretty much kept everyne home last weekend anyway.
I know I am influenced by my own experience as a grounded teenager. I was grounded for a month during my senior year of high school (I promise, it wasn’t that bad!) and my Dad often left me home alone to go on dates with his then-fiancée.
That loneliness stayed with me, and molded my thinking about “grounding” as a punishment. Yes, it makes sense to curtail a teenager’s social life, but I think that free time should be replaced with more family time–reinforcing those family bonds and family values that hopefully will guide future decision-making.
Were you ever grounded?
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I spent lots of high school grounded and already joke with the husband I want to ground her a lot—just so I can gaze upon her countenance 🙂
Well, Miz, chances are she will spend most of the time in her room not wanting to be gazed upon!
~ Courtenay
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I was grounded a bunch of times and recall spending lots of time in my room – alone, away from family….I was mad about being grounded! That said, it did not seem too bad – I often was still allowed to talk on the phone. These days, it seems like taking away the cell phone, blackberry, email access could be worse than "home confinement" grounding!
Phew! When I saw the title I thought you were referring to you! How long is he grounded for? And thank goodness he is entering his last year of high school, not college! I think the family time is nice, but not mandatory on your part.. after all it is a punishment..I wouldn't be giving up a night out if I were you, or rushing home. I doubt a teenager these days would even mind being left alone.. my son would love that more than having me hovering! Does he still have his computer, phone, etc? And football kicks off soon.. Patriots are playing at night next Monday!
This particular infraction did not warrant the complete plug-pulling. We did that once and realized his grandparents were trying to reach him all week. Oops!
I know we don't have to stay home, but since this is senior year I am soaking up whatever time we have together! And, you're right, from his perspective our presence probably augments the punishment. 😉
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I always feel like the punishment imposed on the kids changes what's going on in the house. At my kids' age, usually a punishment warrants me coming up with new things to do and usually involves board games and bike rides (punishments are usually losing screen time). I think I'd do the same as you in being around more if my high schooler was grounded.
I remember punishments when I was in high school were usually taking the phone away. But, my mom also worked, so I'd talk on the phone after school until she got home. She told me later that she knew I'd do it, but there wasn't anything she could do about it, so she had to let it go.
Well, Carrie, when your kids are a bit older, remember that confiscating their cell phones is just about the worst punishment imaginable!
I also thought the title referred to you! Glad that isn't the case. Yay for spending more time together & strengthening that bond. The biggest punishment to my 4 year old is taking away TV privileges and toys, which is exactly what we did yesterday when she acted out repeatedly at church. (Nice!) So we are also being creative about spending time together. More work for Hubs & I, but we're enjoying the book reading and the snuggles. 🙂
Yep, I think one reason why so many kids are under-disciplined is that it does take WORK. But that is our JOB as parents!
I remember losing phone privileges, of all things. Can't remember why. Our teen did something grounding-worthy a couple of weeks before he left for college. But my husband and I agreed that it was a moot point by then. And we hoped the experience shook him up enough to help avoid anything similar. Had it happened at the beginning of the summer… grounding would certainly have been happening.