Cycling scares me. More particularly, climbing a steep hill while clipped in scares me. And for good reason. I’ve had my share of falls and bloody knees when I didn’t have quite enough momentum or wasn’t in the right gear or just panicked and fell over and didn’t unclip on my way down. I push through this fear almost every weekend but there’s one particular route that instilled such a visceral fear it took me almost four years to face it.
The elevation profile never tells the whole story. It’s not the elevation climb over those uphill miles that is challenging, it’s the series of steep hills represented by each blip on this graph. This is the route I trained on for Ragnar. There are several hills I can barely run up.
The hills that scares me are on the Custis Trail, a 4 mile path that connects the north end of the Mount Vernon Trail with the Washington & Old Dominion Trail. (In the map above, it’s the top segment of the Arlington Loop.)
There is one particularly scary part where the path rises likes a corkscrew and then continues climbing over an overpass. I rode it once before I started using clipless pedals, and haven’t braved it since. My husband has been encouraging me to do it, but I haven’t been ready. My fear was real. My fear was visceral. Just thinking about it got my heart rate up and set me on the verge of tears.
But the amazing women in my Moms Run This Town/She Runs This Town Multisport group aren’t afraid–or at least aren’t held back by their fears. I read their reports of riding the Arlington Loop in both directions and was inspired. I opened up about my fears and they encouraged me. And then two weeks ago, it happened.
Facing Down Visceral Fear
The day started with rain–wet bike paths are another justified cycling fear–so I decided to go to an indoor cycling class instead of a long bike ride with my husband. But by the time the class was over, the sun was out and the roads were dry. With the Farm to Fork Fondo coming up in a few weeks–there’s still time to join me!–I didn’t want to miss a chance for an outdoor ride, so I showered, had lunch, and headed out again.
At about 15 miles, the Arlington Loop is the perfect distance for a second ride of the day. I adopted a what you can when you can approach, and decided I would see how I felt when I got to that hill. My plan was to see how far I could make it unclipped, but as I approached the hill I felt strong, so I stayed clipped in. As I climbed the hill, I thought of all my friends who had made it to the top, and channeled their mojo. As I climbed and turned and climbed and turned, I still felt strong. I stood up as I approached the very top, and was beaming with a huge smile when I nearly passed my husband at the end. 😀
I did it! I conquered that hill! I overcame my fear!
But visceral fear isn’t like a bubble that pops and disappears. I’m still afraid of that hill. The thought of riding up it again still puts me on edge. But now that I know I can ride up that hill, I will continue to push through the fear until that route becomes my favorite route when I’m up for a challenge.
[Tweet “Overcome Visceral Fear On My Bike #cycling #bikechat”]
Today’s Wednesday Word is visceral.
Have you overcome a visceral fear?
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I get those ” butterflies” in my stomach when I’m facing a fear like that! The best thing for me to do is to tackle it head on! Glad you did the same thing with that hill. Tame the beast!
Yes, tackling it head on is the way to go — if you’re ready!
It is exactly that fear that keeps me from biking altogether, but quite frankly, I never particularly enjoyed it, not even as a kid. I’m also kind of mindful that I’m aging, and I don’t really need to put my body at risk that way.
SUP definitely scared me. I really hope I get to try it again, but right now, I’m kind of housebound most of the time. 🙁
Good job facing down that fear!
SUP iteself doesn’t scare me – because I don’t care if I fall in the water — but SUP in the possibly polluted water near me scares me in case I do fall into THAT water. I really want to try it though!
I get that same feeling in my stomach when I am scared. Sometimes while biking I am afraid to go to fast on the down hill more than I am scared of the up hill. What scares me more is open water swimming!
I definitely am cautious going down hill. The rolling hills of W & OD are fine, but on Custis I’m on the brakes!
GET IT LADY! That is awesome, and inspiring for me right now–I’m still playing some parts of my life a bit too safely!
Way to go!
I’m such a newbie to cycling and feel like I still have my training wheels on since I don’t have clip in shoes 😉 I love cycling and using it for cross training. I mainly ride on trails so I’m hoping to build my confidence and start riding on the main road one day to work and back home.
I think I rode for about a year before I got clip in shoes. As scary as it was, I love the extra power so there’s no going back!
WOOHOOO!!! Way to go!! Conquering fears is no easy feat, but I’m glad you have an encouraging husband and a sense of self-badassery 🙂
Hah, both are essential, right?!
Good for you!
I’ve only ever used clips in a spin class, because I’m sure I’d end up falling if I were to try them on the road.
The trick is remember to un-clip when you stop! They’re worth it though for the extra power.
I’m so with you. I am a little scared of riding in general but I have started slowly with the encouragement of my husband. You are doing great though. Keep it up!
Way to get over that!
clips SCARE me! I am such a klutz, and incredibly (almost slap-stick) UNgraceful. It will be a long time before I overcome that fear LOL Awesome job on spanking that hill 😉
Good for you to go after and overcome your fear. Its never easy to overcome fears, but coming out on the other side is always so rewarding.
Yes, I really was so proud of myself! I had to be ready though.
Awesome job overcoming this fear! I’ve never seen”visceral” being tied to fear but it makes sense.
Congratulations on conquering your fear! I have never ridden a bike with clips so that in itself would really scare me!
Great job on facing your fears! I was listening to a the Blissful Bites podcast today and the interviewee was talking about facing your fears and if we don’t face them then we can’t grow.
yea! Way to kick it in the butt! That is super exciting- thanks for sharing it with us! I am not a bike rider but the thought of a hill like that would make anyone have butterflies!
Nice job, Coco! I really enjoyed your take on our Wednesday Word, and felt like I was climbing that trail with you! I’m not sure I will ever have the courage to clip in on a bike.
Thanks for linking up!
Woohoo great job making it to the top of the hill, hopefully every time it will be a bit less scary.
Congrats on topping that hill! For what it’s worth, cycling terrifies me too. For every triathlon I’ve done, that’s been the segment where I’m absolutely freaked (the swim is awful in terms of performance, but I’m typically not worried). All I can do for bike training, generally, is go to Hains Point and do loops there, which come in under 3.5 miles for each loop. You’d think it’s tough to do an hour or more workout there, but I’m NEVER bored — always freaked! But I’ve saved the large version of that Arlington map you posted and might give it a try before I leave the DC area!
Wohoo! Way to show that hill who is boss!! I get those butterflies in my stomach with certain situations where I need to confront someone at work and I know its not going to be pretty–that hill seems pretty scary too!
Great job overcoming that fear and I am glad you are able to talk about it and inspire others by your experience.
WTG! Great job facing your fear head on – never an easy thing to do, but always so rewarding when you come out on the other side.
Being clipped into a bike and going up and down hills would terrify me as well!! You’re stuck! You can’t “eject” if you need to! Biking is soooo not my thing, so I certainly give you a lot of credit!
I’m also all for the what you can when you can approach, and hooray for conquering that hill! Great job! I feel ya on fears coming back even if you overcame it once, but I think knowing that you’ve done it before and made it through definitely helps! <3
So, if you ever visit Madison again, I’m assuming you won’t want to go on an Ironman bike loop with me? just under 3000 ft of climbing!
Congrats on getting up that hill! Keep doing it!
You know I’d love to try it! Maybe someday ….