I generally do not think of myself as a judgmental person, but there are certain areas where I find it hard not to judge others. I confessed as much on Carla’s blog, and admitted that the circumstances say more about me than about whomever I’m judging.
Carla has written about the downside of keeping secrets, and I know that when I feel like I can’t talk about what’s worrying me I am more likely to feel overwhelmed, suffer from insomnia, and slide towards depression. But I suffer in silence because I fear that others will pass judgment. I keep those secrets because worse than feeling alone is feeling judged.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that a lot of my struggles are more common than I thought. When I’ve opened up to trusted friends, I’ve been met with understanding instead of judgment. But I still hesitate, because I’m not sure what their reaction will be. When I stay “connected” to my friends through their Facebook feeds, I forget that their lives are not as perfect as they seem. When I assume that they have their sh*t together as shown by their edited, filtered Instagram photos, I worry that they will judge me for the messy state of mine.
Coincidentally, I stumbled across a new podcast this weekend called The Secret Room. I only listened to a few episodes, but one thing that struck me was that the secrets that people had been keeping for a lifetime did not reflect as badly on them as they feared. Maybe that’s because as much as we fear the judgment of others, we are our own harshest critics.
This week’s Wednesday Word is judgmental. Are you?
Do you know other story-based podcasts I should listen to?
![The Ultimate Coffee Date](http://got2run4me.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/Ultimate-Coffee-Date.png" "The Ultimate Coffee Date")
You KNOW I adore this.
And most especially right now the very notion of the fact we ARE NOT UNIQUE AT ALL.
In the best way.
We are our own harshest critics and what we may look at ourselves and think IM SO ____ IM THE ONLY ONE WHO_____! so many others are doing or experiencing right at that same time.
<3
I agree! I can keep things to myself for fear of judgment.
Oh for sure, there’s things I don’t share because I’m afraid of being judged. I like what Carla said, tho, that we are not unique. And no one is more critical of us than we are.
What an interesting take on this! I am my own worst critic as well. I’ve tried to really remove myself from interacting with people whom I feel are judgemental and critical.
You know, it’s funny — I can definitely be hard on myself, but at the same time, in general, I’m a pretty open person. I share things on my blog that others might not share on theirs, although I suppose most of it isn’t very deep. It’s easier to share on the blog, because there isn’t anyone staring you in the face and judging you!
But photos — oh yes, those are definitely carefully edited. I may share a few bad ones here and there, but the ones with the double chin are never used!
I think it is so funny how easy it is to share on our blogs, just because we can’t see everyone we’re sharing with!
OMG this is so relevant to me! I’ve been thinking about all this myself. I have found that I have gotten to be too judgemental recently and am actively trying to stop. I even disabled my facebook for a few weeks just to get rid of all the “perfect” life posts that were bringing me down. I’m learning more and more how much more beneficial it is to be open and honest with yourself and others!
Sometimes I am immune to the Facebook effect, but other times I am more vulnerable. We just have to remember that Facebook doesn’t tell the whole story.
Oh I LOVE your take on this….I agree that social media makes it so much easier to judge ourselves with everyones cookie cutter pictures and filtered instagram pics!!
Thanks! I’m glad it resonated with you. Maybe we need to remember the “story” we’re projecting too.
I definitely agree that we’re our own harshest critics. Thanks so much for linking up!